The reason?
Because if your baby of a manuscript suddenly becomes un-writable you find yourself stranded in a no man's land of repetitive thought and daydreams that only change in the details.
It's even worse when you know you cannot use these thoughts because they border-line on plagiarism or fan-fiction due to the influence of the number of t.v. shows you watch to fill the empty chasm that used to be your creative cauldron.
Music and socializing used to be my muses. I'm trying a new one to get my brain out of the gutter of "well-that's-dumb-idea" thought. I think a year of editors brain has nearly killed my creative vine. But, as I've learned recently from a collapsed grape arbor and an afternoon of pruning, vines are hard to kill. So long as they have a root, a "trunk" and maybe a few shoots, it'll always grow back. All it needs is time, patience, guidance, and a sturdy support.
So anyway, my new idea. I've discovered the perfect formula for dreams. Sleep, wake up early, preferably after maybe five or six hours. Do something productive, go back to sleep. THEN when you wake up, instantly recall and write down what you were dreaming. I'm getting some pretty crazy dreams from this exercise. But at least they're fresh ideas instead of the stagnant ones that have been plaguing my waking hours. How did I discover this formula? Newspapers, my friends, delivering newspapers in the cold, wet, morning to grumpy people who haven't had their coffee yet. Oh the things we put up with to earn money for college.
It's weird to not have a book to work on during my "summer" time. I've always had some kind of project since middle school. This break I have nothing. It could be that I need time from the shock of my last effort. But three months should be enough time right?
Maybe the scariest part of anything we do happens in the moment before. The uncertainty of success, the fear of the plunge, the desperation to know that you are doing the right thing and the hope that you're not the only one who believes in your dreams.
I think I get too caught up in the dream of my own freshly printed, wonderfully covered novel when I hit on a good idea that I instantly kill it. I wonder if it's possible for me to just write for fun anymore. That's how I used to do it. I came up with such wonderful adventure stories to. And it all started in a backyard with my sisters and my neighbors playing orphans, heroes, cat-creatures, and wolves. No one was critiquing us. We just wanted to act out a fun story.
Maybe I should just do Brother Babcocks method of closing my eyes and writing none stop until I run out of time. Scrape that document, and then write again. Just to get out of this block.
The adventure music I'm listening too right now makes this feel like an epic idea.
Here's the plunge.
Go.
Incidentally, here are my recent favorite works. The ones that made my eyes pop and mouth call out, "Brilliant!"
TV
Castle
NCIS
Doctor Who
Dororo (2007)
Books
Bridge to Terabithia
The Obsidian Trilogy
Pride and Predjudice (Ok, not all of it, but some things are pretty remarkable)
Agatha Cristie's books
Patricia C. Wrede's novels
...and that's about all I can come up with off the top of my head. Basically I liked all these for their plot twists, unexpected endings, feelings heroism, and really brilliant characters. To me, anything that makes my soul sing is a good work no matter what any other critic says.
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